Well I got my AP scores back and I was not pleased. After all the blood sweat and tears put into a concentration portfolio, all I get back is a 3.

In case you don't know, 3 is "qualified" or a C.

I try so hard to please these pretentious "fine art" people who feel that they can put a number on my work, I don't see the point of it anymore. I tried to make my concentration "meaningful" and "poignant," playing not with one but two elements I wasn't used to (abstract because a big red square on a canvas actually MEANS something in this so-called art world; and color). And they say, meh, you're okay.

I want to be pissed off, but I'm not. It's the same old song and dance every time my art is judged. My art's just not enough. It's not meaningful, it doesn't strike people. It's not memorable.

Well thank the good Lord in heaven I'm pursuing History.

Screw art. It is a complete joke and only meant as a hobby.


Which is precisely what I will do with my art from now on: I will do it for myself ONLY. I will draw what I want, not what people believe is "moving" or "relevant" or "significant." Because what that kind of art is is the satyrical "o0oh I'm going to do my portfolio on the hypocrisy of a high school classroom."


Art doesn't have to be valid. Sometimes it's just there to please the eye.

So I will.

-grace